Skip to main content

Resentment for the Healthy

 


One of the things I really struggle with as a chronically person is when people close to me don't feel well or have a sore joint and act like it's the end of the world.  I understand it sucks to be sick and in pain, I am every single day all day long. They get one minor inconvenience and they're able to take the day off and I end up taking care of them.  That's fine and I don't mind except I'm worse than that on a daily basis and no one is fussing over me or saying, just take it easy.  It builds a lot of resent for me because I wish I were able to feel so good most of the time that one symptom seems like the end of the world to me.  

Because I am chronically ill, I am just expected to get used to it, or suck it up and still function like everyone else. A "normal, healthy person" would never function under the circumstances that we do.  Their minds can't even begin to comprehend the level of illness and pain we function with. I wish I had that privilege.  

I wake up every morning feeling like I've been hit by a bus.  My joints are stiff and hurting and I am nauseated. Sometimes I even have a headache the moment I wake up. I never feel energized and usually feel more tired than the night before. A normal person would never function like this, but I do every single day. I have no choice.

I die a little inside every time someone says I'm so tired you know? Yes, I do know. I live with severe, chronic fatigue.  You will go to bed tonight and be fine tomorrow.  I won't. Same with a headache.  Yup, I understand, I get daily migraines.  Joint pain sucks....you don't say.  People definitely don't think before they speak.  They're preaching to the choir.  They're upset over one symptom and I deal with 25+ a day. I try so hard to sympathize, but I find it very difficult.   

It's beyond frustrating to me to be unable to communicate the immense pain I'm in and have a healthy person understand what I'm describing.  I wish my friends and family could each spend 20 minutes in my body.  I know it's not their fault that they don't understand, but I think if the rest of the population had a better idea of what chronically ill people are up against, maybe there would be some change.  The world is not user friendly for the sick and disabled. I wish there was more understanding and accommodations. I also really wish healthy people wouldn't try to compare their 12-24 hour inconvenience to my never ending chronic illness and joint damage. 

How do you deal with friends and family members who complain about a minor issue, but push your serious issues aside and expect you function normally? 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Getting Diagnosed

Have you ever had the moment where you get such life changing news that you freeze and can see and feel your entire world crashing around you.  Everything suddenly makes sense and your brain is making connections and explanations for things you once couldn't explain. This was how I felt being diagnosed with Lupus. It was all very overwhelming, and you're not told how much your life will change, or how to cope with it all.   I have been tired and fatigued my whole existence and never thought anything of it.  I thought waking up in the morning was physically painful for everyone.  I've always fractured bones easily and had numerous other injuries throughout my life and could never figure out why.  I had daily migraines and was told by doctors that it was hormonal and that I would outgrow it.   Fast forward to age 23 when I was recovering from having the meniscus in my left knee removed.  I had made an appointment with my sports medicine doctor because I thought I had possibly

Who I Am and Why Start a Blog

I'm a 36 year old female who is chronically ill, disabled and currently at the end of her rope. (I've decided to attempt to remain anonymous, but that may change at some point.) I'm exhausted on every level and tired of countless doctor appointments, surgeries and being picked and poked at. I was originally diagnosed with Lupus SLE at age 23, but since then I've acquired many more diagnosis such as Rheumatoid Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Interstitial Cystitis, Severe Asthma, Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue, Anemia, Hyperthyroidism/Hypothyroidism, Polyarthopathy, Tachycardia, Migraines, Chronic Urticaria, Panic Disorder, Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety, spinal stenosis in the neck, hernia discs, severe reflux and hiatal hernia. I also recently found out that I have labral tears in both hips with a cyst in the right hip. I'm currently awaiting my appointment with a specialist where I'm going to be told I need total hip replacements. Looking back