I'm a 36 year old female who is chronically ill, disabled and currently at the end of her rope. (I've decided to attempt to remain anonymous, but that may change at some point.) I'm exhausted on every level and tired of countless doctor appointments, surgeries and being picked and poked at. I was originally diagnosed with Lupus SLE at age 23, but since then I've acquired many more diagnosis such as Rheumatoid Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Interstitial Cystitis, Severe Asthma, Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue, Anemia, Hyperthyroidism/Hypothyroidism, Polyarthopathy, Tachycardia, Migraines, Chronic Urticaria, Panic Disorder, Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety, spinal stenosis in the neck, hernia discs, severe reflux and hiatal hernia. I also recently found out that I have labral tears in both hips with a cyst in the right hip. I'm currently awaiting my appointment with a specialist where I'm going to be told I need total hip replacements.
Looking back, I've shown symptoms of RA and Lupus my entire life, but growing up the 90's, I was told it was growing pains and to get over it. I was a competitive dancer from age 2-19, so I was always active. I opened my own dance studio at 20 years old. During this time, I also acquired three college degrees. Unfortunately, due to my declining health, I decided to sell my business 7 years later and move from the Midwest to Florida in hope of the better weather magically curing me. It didn't cure me, but I did find much better doctors and not having to survive freezing temperatures does help a little. I'm currently on disability trying to figure out how to survive this nightmare and how to have a purpose in life while not over doing it but also trying to keep up with everyone around me and convince them that I'm not a waste of space. In future blogs, I will break down more details into my illnesses, procedures/surgeries and other experiences. I'm hoping this will be a healthy outlet and a place where others can find comfort in knowing they're not alone.
I've decided to start a blog mainly out of frustration, feeling alone, and the need to get real information out there. I've realized within my interactions with healthy people, that they lack the understanding of the stress and constrictions that are placed on chronically ill and disabled people. Unless you are living this nightmare, you're completely unaware. I'm tired of people saying it could be worse, look for positive, or there's a hidden blessing somewhere. It honestly makes me want to punch something. This blog won't be pretty, or sugar coated. This will be real stories, feelings, information, and thoughts.
I'm hoping this blog will help others in this situation feel less alone, help share resources, and help those interacting with us to have a better understanding of what we're going through and the support we desire. This will start off with my experiences and opinions, but I would love to hear from others and add their thoughts as well.
I hope this gives you a better understanding of what this blog will be about and a little bit about myself. I'd really like to create a community where we can share our experiences and needs, help others who feel alone, and help the healthy people around us gain a better understanding of what we're going through.
I made an Instagram to share memes, inspiration and other information. Follow me @chronicallyspeakingblog
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